May 22nd, 2012

Beckett

this week, ugh.

So I had 5 days off from work-would have been blissful had my allergies not gotten completely out control. I've been doing benadryl with a decongestant and saline rinses in my nostrils, but it was no longer effective. Ended up at urgent care after a few days of running on 3 or 4 hours of sleep a night and having the swelling and congestion trigger some asthma. Docs gave me a steroid shot, an intense round of oral steroids to take over this week, and Flonase. I can breathe now, yay! And the Flonase smells like roses, it's so weird. I felt an improvement immediately. Neither drug is ideal for pregnancy~Class C drugs, one of those "tell your doctor if you are pregnant or trying to get pregnant" things, but the benefits definitely outweigh the risks considering I'm not actually pregnant yet~I'm in the 2 week wait again.

In other news, I found out my batshit crazy cousin is pregnant. She's a 35 year old hoarder with impulse and anger issues, and if she'd go to a doctor, she'd most likely be diagnosed as bipolar. She's been in jail a couple times for drug stuff and once for assault during one of her impulsively angry destructive times. There is a man in her life. He's been supportive and loved her (from a safe distance) for the past 15 years, but she treats him like crap most of the time. She decided she wanted a baby, but he wasn't good looking enough, so she started banging her 20 year old neighbor's young-20 something boyfriend, because she wanted a "cute baby". My uncle was pissed at her until they found out it was a boy. Crazy cousin is one of three girls~my uncle is the last of his line. Crazy cousin's lovely awesome sister got married and her husband took her last name, but they had 2 little girls and she got her tubes tied. So now that there's a little boy coming to "carry the family name" he'll likely continue to support crazy cousin~she lives in a house he bought for her, pays the majority of her bills, etc. She works part-time at the front desk of a hotel, but that's it.

It frustrates me~because here's a woman who absolutely should NOT be bringing a child into the world. She's unstable and not able to support a child in any way a child would need support. Part of me hopes that this will be what turns her life around, but the realistic part of me knows it won't. So, best case scenario, the awesome cousin (who is estranged from the crazy one for a multitude of reasons but would never blame a baby for it's mother) will end up raising the baby along with her girls. And she is a fantastic mother. I think if this kid has any shot of growing up in a stable environment while staying in the family, it'll be with her.